Country Bears Jamboree
From the Disney theme park attraction (1971-1972). The Country Bear Jamboree animatronic Disneyland and Disneyworld theme park attraction was introduced to the two parks in 1971 and 1972. Their show sadly furthered the hurtful sterotypes of bears as ignorant, goofy hicks with their smorgasbord of cornpone comedy and hillbilly tunes.
A 1972 soundtrack album was released with a lavish gatefold cover and copious liner notes on the fictional members which I will now plunder shamelessly:
- Henry - The master of ceremonies, and "bearitone" (sigh) who wears Sammy, a live raccoon hat. He sings "The Ballad of Davy Crockett."
- Wendell - Henry's partner, on mandolin. He and Henry sing "Mama, Don't Whip Little Buford."
- Gomer - Honky-tonk pianist who studied classical piano at Julliard until prejudice against bears, fatties, and fat bears drove him back to the hills.
- The Five Bear Rugs - Quintet that's been together since 1st grade. Zeke on banjo, Zeb on fiddle, Ted on jug, Fred on hamonica, and Tennessee on one-stringed thing. And Zeb's son Oscar.
- Liver-Lips McGrowl - AKA "Miami Serenader," he sings "My Woman Ain't Pretty (But She Don't Swear None)."
- Trixie - A Mae West-esque bearess and veteran music hall performer known as the " Tampa Temptress," she sings "Tears Will Be the Chaser For My Wine."
- Terrence - Guitar playing bear known as "The Vibrating Wreck from Nashville Tech," he sings "How Long Will My Baby Be Gone?"
- The Sun Bonnets - Trio of cute girl bears: Bunny, Bubbles, and Beulah. They sing "All the Guys That Turn Me On Turn Me Down." Uh, maybe they turn you down cause you're jailbait?
- Ernest the Dude - Dapper bear who plays the fiddle. He sings "If Ya Can't Bite, Don't Growl," a pearl of ursine wisdom if there ever was one.
- Teddi Barra - The other Mae West-esque bearess, also known as "The Jewel of the Dakotas," she sings "Heart, We Did All We Could," descending from the ceiling on a swing.
- Big Albert - Guitarist bear born in Pocatello, Idaho. He sings "Blood on the Saddle." Damn he's big.
See also The Country Bears.